Being sick…

I hate being sick. . . The type of sickness I have ensures I don’t get to forget it, either. Heh.

 

So yes, no update in the last couple days, I’ve been flirting with the VA and laying on my back feeling sorry for myself. Fortunately that doesn’t last as long as the runny nose and nausea, so I’ll be back into it in no time.

 

I’ll have something up very soon because I need to get this done and get this book out.

Six Days Until Volume One

Welcome to Monday!

Six days remaining and I’ve not written a single word  today– nursing a killer headache and a whole lot of other stuff getting done like laundry and such. I’m reminded every day that despite what life might tell us about how crappy people can be to one another (think Rwanda), there are also those groups of people that, while they might be in the minority of the population, are not to be ignored for their compassion and humanity.

It’s people like those (who know who they are), that inspire others to goodness and, I truly believe and hope, improve the world around us just by their being there. I’ve been very, very blessed to know some of these people. . . I hope that one day I’ll be in a position to follow their example and help someone else out too.

Those people know who they are and may or may not appear in the acknowledgments of my entries, so I’m not going to embarrass them except to say thank you.

Sincerely.

Thank you.

Seven Days to Volume 1

Welcome to Sunday!

So, I got volume 3’s main arc finished off and cleaned up as much as I can and now I’m focusing on getting Four Squared set up and ready to go. I’ve got it planned out to a T– I think– and I’m going to be hitting it hard starting Monday.

ypwjuKn

 

 

[Volume 3 Word Count. Feels good!]

My patreon subscribers will be getting their copies as soon as they’re squared away and ready to go, whereupon it’ll go up for sale on my blog. Subscribers to my blog will get their discount coupons and then it’ll go to Amazon, too.

Also, I can’t say for sure that anything’s going to come of this, but I’ve been chatting with someone about doing an audiobook version of it as well. That’d be super exciting, but I can’t promise anything on it!

On the bright side, I can promise that E-Book formats will run the entire range– epub, mobi, PDF, so on and so forth. All DRM free!

I’m also looking into finding a good Print on Demand service that doesn’t require me to have an address to work from in order to send out books to people who order them. If you’ve got anyone you’ve worked with before, please let me know in the comments below!

Also, if you want to get my books for free, please consider becoming a patron– patrons who pledge 5 dollars or more get all my books for free, those who donate 20 dollars or more get printed versions of my books for free, too!

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See you tomorrow!

Nine Days to Volume 1

Another day, another 2400 words. . .

I’m almost finished with volume 3, finally. This volume has been absolutely kicking my ass in terms of desire to finish it. I think a lot of it is my attitude towards the whole thing and generally just not feeling well. That said, I’m kind of okay with the way things are going, I hope I’ll be able to get more done over the weekend, though.

I’m really excited about getting the first volume published and, hopefully, getting ahead of the curve so I can have things lined up in queue and ready to go. I’m going to forgo graphic because it hasn’t really changed at all– I was just cleaning up stuff in preparation for posting it.

Instead, I will share with you what I’ve been using to help pull myself out of my funk. . .

Some time ago I punched ‘self discipline’ into a search engine and came across someone named Brian Tracy. Boiled down, his system is pretty straightforward.

The idea is to grab yourself a spiral bound notebook and write down ten goals. You do this every day in the frame as though you’ve already completed them. So instead of “I will make 20 dollars every day.” You would write your goals as “I make 20 dollars every day.” This works on your subconsciousness because while /you/ know you might not currently make 20 dollars a day, you’re giving your mind a command that says “I want this.”

Now, while you’re going through your day, while you’re sleeping or taking a long shower (god I miss those), your mind is working on how it can get you to a point where you’re making 20 dollars per day. Pretty straightforward, right?

Yes. That’s the whole trick to this. It’s ridiculously simple but also pretty effective.

Brian prescribes that you do this first thing in the morning when you wake up so it affirms your desire to do the things you’re setting yourself out to do. The other trick to it is that you write down the same goals daily, without referencing the previous day’s writing. You don’t have to get the same specific order down, you want the intent. You want to cement those goals in your mind. Because of this, you usually want to give yourself a time frame to accomplish these things.

I’m going to expand on this tomorrow, but McDonalds is closing here in 2 minutes, so I need to go find someplace to sleep, in the meantime, here is what my goal list looks like:

  1. I make 150.00 for every patreon post I make by January 1
  2. I have 2,000 dollars saved up to move by December 1 (because winter sucks!)
  3. Daily, I write 2,500 words without fail by January 1
  4. I have a stable address (preferably in a different state) by December 1
  5. My passport is in hand by Jan 18
  6. I published 2 volumes of the Dragon Slayers by September 15
  7. I wrote 2 full novels by January 18
  8. I have an emergency fund of 2,500 dollars by March 1
  9. My time management skills have improved greatly by Jan 1
  10. I have sold 500 copies of my work by January 18

Pretty simple, I know, but in 5 days I went from being monstrously apathetic to having some direction and, most importantly in my position, hope. . .

That, more than anything, is invaluable.

Ten Days to Volume 1

Welp, here we are with day 1 progress:

5,700 words on volume 3! Almost finished with it, I’m going to get chapter 5 polished up and polished off, then post it up first thing tomorrow– or maybe tonight if I get really ambitious. I also got a bit more planning done on volume 1’s revisions, I’d say I’m about 28% done with that, which I’ll get more done on when I can devote myself fully to it as I have with finishing volume 3’s main arc. The interludes will probably be done over the week as I can get a few words in here and there, but I really want to get volume 1 set up and done as polished as I can make it.

I’ve actually been reading some stuff about goal setting and how to get things done, including long term planning and getting motivation going. I’ll share those tomorrow, but McDonalds closes in 15 minutes, so I doubt I’ll be able to get it put together.

That said, here’s the progress wheel for today:

 

Aug21Goalwheel

Eleven Days for Volume 1

So, it’s been incredibly hard to get myself writing. . . As in, I didn’t get much of anything done last month at all– between the depression and feelings of hopelessness (I’m all right now, I’ve had a chance to get my head sorted out. . . I’ll be all right) but in this, I understand that I haven’t really been keeping my end of the bargain here– I haven’t finished Volume 1 as I wanted to!

This isn’t cool and it isn’t acceptable. So, I decided what I’m going to do this month is lay out my plan and do daily updates on it until I get the first volume cleaned up and published. For the sake of completeness, I’ve included my handy daily goal wheel which will get updated as I add to the goals.

The daily goal right now has been to get volume 3 finished up but that hasn’t happened! I’m going to keep working on it, but in the meantime, I’ve set up a rough plan to fix the volume up and give it a cohesive self-contained story that people will enjoy and be aroused by– naturally.

So, I’m going to get started first thing tomorrow and I’ll post an update this time tomorrow night along with the updated graph might have fallen off track, but dammit, I know I’m better than this. I’m also hoping someone will learn something through this, so let’s find out!

Oh, and I also plotted out a pilot for a serial. . . You can expect to hear more about that this week, too.

So, here’s the graphic. Shaded areas show completion:

 

Aug20Goalwheel

A Dark Dance. . . and some perspective.

I’ve been struggling for some time with how exactly I’m going to present this or what exactly I’m going to say. . . As a writer, I know I should know be able to present my feelings in a clear, concise way that makes everything swirling around in my brain understandable to myself and whomever reads these words.

But I can’t.

God, I can’t do it. . . I don’t have the words– the Rosetta Stone, if you will. For someone who attempts to make a living with words, I’m really bad at it when it comes to emotions, hey?

I’ve been struggling for some time with that feeling of ‘I’m never going to get out of this’, compounded by the thought that my laptop, my only option for making any kind of money, and if I’m being honest, my connection to the world at large, is going to fail me. This, after a scare earlier when my lcd panel cracked. . .

It sucks.

It’s depressing. It’d gotten to the point a couple times where I started looking at the things I have with me and I started looking at alternative uses for them… I don’t like being that person. I don’t like thinking that way, and I don’t want to consider the ramifications if I did something stupid. That’s not /me/ god dammit.

I’m sorry I haven’t been around to put more work out, but my muse has been taking a vacation on me. . . I’ve tried wrangling the bitch back under control several times and it just refuses to come. . .

Between the depression and the lack of creative juices, I’ve been having a hell of a time getting my head straightened out. I’m still trying to work on it, but. . . it’s hard. It’s hard to stay focused, it’s hard to remember what it is I’m after sometimes and, more than anything, it’s killing me to try and find the soul to /write/.

With Robin Williams’s suicide, we’re given a very poignant reminder what depression can do if left unchecked. But, by the same token, we need to understand that by asking for help, we’re putting a huge burden on the person we’re asking to help us. . .

I have no point with this post except to say that I’m alive and only by the grace of my girlfriend, the -very- kind words and help I’ve been offered by friends and supporters alike, I’m alive and I’m fed… healthy as can be given the circumstances, and trying my damndest to get something written for you folks.

Seriously, from the bottom of my heart, thank you for everything you’ve done for me. I don’t deserve it. . . But I will never forget it. Thank you.

A million times, thank you.